Category Archives: Family

Protected: The Giving Up is the Hardest Part (DM or email for PW)

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Filed under Family, I Got 99 Problems., Password Protected, Sister


Last year, on Memorial Weekend, SC and I flew to Massachusetts to a) see NYC with my Dad and b) drive my sister back to Cali to live here. She’d been wanting to move back to Cali ever since my Dad forced her to move to MA. It took her about 4-5 months, but it seemed like she was really adjusting to life here. She had a solid group of friends and she was dating someone.

Then she went back to MA for the holidays. As soon as she came home, things changed dramatically. There was always tension in the house and I felt like she was making it a point to avoid me at all costs. She made me feel like she was mad at me. I’m not sure if she was planning this before she left or not, but finally a week and a half into January, she let me know that she was moving back to MA in March. It was all decided. She had plans. I wasn’t included in any of it.

At first I was really angry and hurt. I’m still hurt. She didn’t even give it a chance here. She hasn’t lived here for a whole year. It took her 4-5 years to even admit that she didn’t completely hate living in MA. I feel like I took huge risks with my Dad and my Papa to go through with helping her live here, because I thought it would make her happy. And now that it comes down to it, I’m being pushed out. Not to mention, my wedding. She’s my bridesmaid. And she’s moving across the country 5 months before I’m getting married.

Now things are very distant. She’s hardly home, she doesn’t even sleep here most nights. And when she is home, her room is completely shut up, like she doesn’t want anything to do with living with me. I have to ask her to do her dishes after a week and a half of them sitting in the sink. And I am pretty sure her room smells like weed. This went from being a great living experience, to totally horrible.

It’s like, what happened? How did she so completely change? And is she treating me the way my Dad treated me before he moved to try and “detach” himself from me? Because this is totally reminiscent of the 6 months before my father left. I feel rejected. And I feel like this might affect our relationship for a very long time. And that makes me want to bawl my eyes out.


January 20, 2013 · 2:07 pm

I never miss a chance to Just Dance!

Thank you to Ubisoft for sponsoring this post. Please click here to learn more about Ubisoft. I was selected for this opportunity as a member of Clever Girls Collective. #UbiChamps

I went into this game absolutely open-minded, as I had never played any version of Just Dance before. I expected something like many of the other musical competition games out there. I was actually really pleasantly surprised by how much I loved dancing to my favorite guilty pleasures!

I obviously didn’t want to play the game by myself, so I decided to invite my 7-year old cousins (yes, they’re twins!) and their older brother over to boogey with me! First we all went to dinner, with their parents and my Fiancé tagging along, and we ate ALL THE BREADSTICKS KNOWN TO MAN. Turns out that carbs are exactly what you need when heading into a Just Dance bender!

We got home, after my Aunt B and I had tried out some of the Moscato at the restaurant and we had all eaten waaaay more than we should have, and no one wanted to get off the couch. But after letting our food digest for about 15 minutes (didn’t want any of the kids getting sick!), I started the game whether we were ready or not. I did not expect such a workout, but I was soon putting my hair up because I was hot and SWEATY! Seriously, what a workout!

We got the boys (including SC!) together to play a “boy round” and Lance, one of the twins, made us scroll through every single song before he could make his song choice. He complained that there weren’t enough boy songs! Plus, he’s basically an expert at Just Dance 3, playing almost every day after school, so everyone should listen to him.

Kaylee, Lance’s sister, started feeling sick so she didn’t get very into the dancing portion, but she still moved the remote in spirit. And Zander, their older brother, was “too cool for school” and didn’t even want to play when I made him. Even Baya the puppy wanted to play!

Aunt B and I, though, got down with our bad selves. She loved the Rock Lobster, as it was a song she grew up on. I thought the lobster was a liiiittle creepy. My favorite song was (I’ve Had) The Time of my Life! I love Dirty Dancing and I wish I could play with someone who could really lift me up for the super special ending!

And by the time we had played for a few hours, we were all feeling much better about all that food we ate! I can’t wait to bring the game over to play with my family after Thanksgiving dinner! If for no other reason than to get everyone’s blood pumping so that the food digests faster and we will all have room for dessert! In fact, I volunteered my house for Christmas just so we can play Just Dance 4 all day!!

Have you played any of the Just Dance games? Which songs do you think I would love to play? Let me know! And if you’d like to purchase the Just Dance 4 game, just in time for the holidays, you can do so from Amazon or ToysRUs. Happy Dancing!

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Filed under Baya, Blogosphere, Clever Girls Collective, Family, Holidays, SC, VLOG

Leaving the Nest

It’s that time of year again, I’m going camping. Every year I take an extended week off (no matter what else happens during the year, this is a MUST) to go out in the forest, park my butt and my tent by a river, sunbathe, gossip, and MOST IMPORTANTLY make s’mores. My family comes too. And by that, I mean that we rent out at least 8 camp sites within a relative vicinity of each other (we reserve in January to camp in July!) and I spend a week with 35+ of my family members. I’d say it’s sort of like a family reunion, except that’s what a normal birthday party looks like in my family.

But this year is a bit different for me. In previous years, Aunt B’s family and I shared a camp site. We worked together to buy and prepare all the food and pack the equipment. But since SC moved in last October I thought it was probably time to “leave the nest” and have our own camp site. So I’ve been stressing and preparing for this for a solid month. Because Aunt B and I always had specific jobs that we both did well that contributed to the over all camp site. Now I’ve got to remember to do everything by myself. Even the things that I don’t like doing.

I think I’ve got it pretty much covered after making 10 (YES TEN) extensive lists for packing. Almost everything is packed now. We leave tomorrow. I just finished up the work week and SC should be home in a few hours. We’re both beyond exhausted, and we’ve still gotta load most of the gear into the truck tonight. But after tomorrow, it’s seven solid days of relaxation and bliss. Except for all the work that’s involved.

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Filed under All About Moi, Family, SC

The Bert’s Bees


Filed under Blogosphere, Family, VLOG

Pigs and Cowboy Cookies

This is the first Christmas that SC and I are buying gifts as a couple. As in, WE are giving gifts to his mother, father, sister, etc. and vice versa. CONFESSION: Usually, I wait till the last minute and get things only for the people I know I’ll be seeing on Christmas, if that. But not this year, folks. Let the craftiness commence!

We’ve got 14 days until Christmas (HOLY COW) and I’ve already got 90% of my shopping done. Ironically, the only people I haven’t shopped for are those whose gifts I have to ship, and therefore are behind on those. The only gift still not covered is SC’s sister, because I’ve only met her twice and so I delegated that role to him.

We aren’t exactly rolling in the dough right now, since my transmission just went out and so of course everything after that has to go to shit as well, so I really wanted to create all my gifts DIY style. And I think I’ve accomplished that for the most part. A few people in my life, mostly on my side of the family, are getting Cookies in a Jar that I stole and modified from Bakerella (Yes, the CakePop goddess).

These things are so freaking beautiful. I made them in advance because 1) I bought self-sealing jars and 2) I’m giving one away as a Secret Santa gift tonight at my work party. And, of course, I’m making tons of cookies and putting them in tins/takeout boxes as smaller gifts.

The other handy idea is one I’m pretty sure I stole from Shatterboxx, though I’m really too lazy to search for the exact post. SC and I are spray painting piggy banks with chalkboard paint and giving them out with a little pack of chalk included. The idea is to create a space that you can identify what you’re working towards, but enabling that goal to change. Something like this:

Oh, wow. I just searched chalkboard piggy bank images and the Shatterboxx link and image came up. So, there you go. I’m really excited to spray paint those babies to see how they come out. Oh, yeah, & we’re totally keeping one.

The other exciting DIY items are scrapbook pages for both SC’s mom and my Grandad with all their kids/grandkids on them. I had the pictures printed and made the pages. The finished product got framed and I think they’re really going to love them. We did end up purchasing a couple gifts with no DIY theme, but I’m not too worried about it since I caught some really good sales! I think we’ve spent under $100 so far and we’ve gotten gifts for 12 people.  I didn’t do anything DIY for SC, but honestly, we decided we weren’t getting presents for each other, and somehow there are already like 10 presents under the tree! Oh well, I think this is going to be a good Christmas. I mean, I already knew that actually GIVING gifts was fulfilling, but now I’m excited that I’m actually able to do it without completely stressing out!

What are you gifting this year? Anything DIY? I need ideas for next year!

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Filed under Family, Holidays, SC

VEDA Day 9: What Inspires Me

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Filed under All About Moi, Blogosphere, Family, Grandma, VEDA

Some dirty deets and a dilemma, HELP.

So, I have a bit of a dilemma. First, let me give you the backstory. My (male) cousin and I used to live together. When my dad moved to MA, my cousin, his (now-ex) wife, and their son moved in. I hated his ex-wife so I wasn’t excited. But within a year they were divorcing and she was moving back across the country. He continued to live with me for another year or so before buying his own place. This was between 2006 and 2008 when I was just transitioning from high school to college life and he was newly single without a kid for half the year so we partied A LOT. We became super close and, even after he moved out, I still hung out with him on a regular basis. I became a fixture in his group of friends. And because of that, I started dating guys from that group. Also, I should add, that this was during the period in my life where I was making THE WORST DECISIONS EVER.

First, there was a guy named DJ. He was a friend of my cousins girlfriend. He worked with my uncle (Aunt B’s husband) on the other side of my family. He was 29, divorced, a heavy smoker who swore he was quitting… and he still lived with his mother and their two dogs who slept in his bed every night. He’s not around anymore in this scenario, but I just had to mention him because the guy was so laughable.

Next came Army Boy. He had just come home from two back-to-back tours in Iraq and the first night we spent together he cried to me about his war issues. I think that’s where he got me because I felt so bad for him. Honestly, the guy had major PTSD and I hope he got help, though I heard he just headed back for his third tour. He was in the middle of a divorce, lived an hour away on base, and has two children. The thing with him is that my cousin plays community baseball with his ex-wife’s new husband. Consistently, as in, to this day. So when he has a BBQ or invites the grown-ups over from some drinks or even when he throws his son’s birthday party, I have to look at this woman and know that she knows that I had sex with her baby daddy. That while she was grieving her marriage, I was helping her children grow. And I was calling her a bitch in the process. She was a bitch, but still. So there’s that.

There’s also the matter of the third and final guy. The one that is my cousin’s best friend. We’ll call him Saturn Guy. Saturn guy is very sweet, and I still consider him a good friend. He thinks very highly of me and honestly, we could have been a cute couple. I crushed on him while my cousin was living here. Then he moved away to NM for a couple of years with his girlfriend. Then he moved back and she cheated on him and got pregnant by another guy. So there was my chance. We flirted for a long time. He didn’t want to do anything with me at the risk of his friendship. But desire won out and we became FWB. We had sex on an off for about a year. I “caught feelings” for him and I think he did too, but he was too scared to ever do anything about it and so I moved on. There isn’t any bad mojo there. But the problem is that whenever I hang out with my cousin, Saturn Guy is probably going to be there.

I haven’t even seen my cousin in almost a year. We’ve been doing our own thing and our schedules have always been opposite. Now things with SC have got me busier than ever, but I miss my cousin a lot. He was always the family member that I went to for advice. He was the first person I told in my family that I wasn’t a virgin, the only family member I told before I turned 18. We’re trying to find a way to start hanging out again, but I’m worried about these situations I’ve gotten myself into.

Do I let SC know about these things? Do I even bring SC around right out of the gate?  Do I ever mention anything to Army Boy’s ex-wife, or do I suck it up and continue to let the awkwardness control our encounters? And what happens if I get drunk? I don’t have any sort of filter whatsoever with alcohol in my system. I’m liable to make jokes about fucking Saturn Guy and to confess how I feel to Army Boy’s ex.

I think that without these situations, I’d be much more likely to jump at the chance to hang out with my cousin more often. So I need to find a way to get past them. Any suggestions?


Filed under Family, I Got 99 Problems., Relationships, TMI

All of the things.

I swear I want to update more than I do. Life is just so monotonous lately I forget to click on over to wordpress.

So what’s going on? SC and I have hit 6 months. I told my mom that I want her to meet him because I’m going to marry him. All she said was, “Wait.” And would you like to know why? “Because I need to get at least three kids through college first. I don’t have a wedding fund.” I just told her that I wasn’t expecting her to have a wedding fund for 6 kids (3 girls). And that I’m not waiting. I asked Aunt B to back me up (we were video conferencing about our upcoming trip to see my brother graduate HS in Texas) and she just said (all nonchalant-like) “Yeah, probably.” And then she followed up with, “She’s not waiting. If he asked her, she’s going to be jumping down the aisle.” Which? Totally true.

Oh, yeah. I’m going to Texas in June. I did this last year for my sister’s HS grad. Now it’s my brother’s turn. All these kids just need to be done graduating already. It’s costing me too much money. Someone’s gotta have a wedding fund around here.

But before I go to Texas? I’M GOING TO BLOGGERS IN SIN CITY! I went last year and it was the most fun ever. You’ll remember me as Rainbow Mutha-Fucking Brite. Yes, I wore a Rainbow Brite costume. No, I wasn’t the only one in a costume. Yes, I’m probably going to do it again at some point this year. And this time, I will be the only one in a costume.

And hey, in between those two trips, which consists of 8 days, I’m going camping for Memorial Day weekend. Here’s what I’m saying. In the next 30 days, I’ll be in 3 different states. I’m driving to Texas and Vegas and 2 hours north in California. on the upside, all my trips are going to be with AMAZINGpants people. I mean, The Vegas Party Car consists of myself, Ashley, Nico, Katherine, and Nicole. And apparently cardboard Jenn and Phampants?

I’m super stressed about all of this. But I’m also super excited.

Mostly, I’m excited about Vegas right now. I’m excited to: wear my Black, White, & Gold outfit, hang out by the pool and drink, learn yoga (possibly while drunk) from the amazing Jenny & Doni, have an open bar while getting to know all the other #BiSC-ers, be roomies with Tara, drive with all the cool party car peeps, party at PURE nightclub while is in the DJ booth, and for the gift bags/contests/giveaways! AWESOME FREE STUFF YAY! AWESOME PEOPLE YAY! AWESOME VEGAS YAY!

… i think i’m way too excited for my own good. no more caps allowed in this post.

as ashley says, “i love your faces.”

see you in vegas, lovelies.


Filed under Bloggers in Sin City, Blogosphere, Family, Mom, Relationships, SC

She likes to chew things.

Forewarning: This is very much TMI. That being said, read it. It’s hilarious as hell.

Here are a few details that you should know. My dog, Baya, she likes to chew things. She especially likes to chew anything that my vagina touches. I’ve lost many a pair of pretty (and EXPENSIVE!) VS panties to the destruction that my tiny little rat of a dog’s mouth brings. And this is why she’s not allowed in my room. So, of course, she takes it upon herself to sneak in whenever I’m not looking.

And now for the story. Last night, SC and I were laying in bed when the mood struck. And by that I mean that pretty much every night before bed we have sex. Because I like sex. If you don’t know this about me already, you should probably just leave. Or go read 5 random old posts and I bet at least one of them has to do with sex. Anyway. Sex Sex Sex.

So we’re in the middle of a pretty heated session and, well, sometimes (read: a lot) I like it a little rough. And sometimes the condom slips off because apparently my vagina has a death grip. And yes, of course there’s a condom. ALWAYS USE A CONDOM KIDS!

So I dig my fingers in there and pull it out and toss it across the room. Who the fuck cares about a useless piece of rubber. Grab a new one. Don’t stop. All of that is running through my head, but nothing practical. Nowhere in there do I think about my dog. That’s just twisted.

So we finish up, with a new condom, and you know, go through the after sex routine. Bathroom, clean up, redress, throw away condom(s). Except, where the fuck is the condom that  I flung into the middle of my floor somewhere?

That bitch Baya likes to chew her toys, food, stolen underwear, what have you in the hallway. So I, of course, assume it’s there. But it’s not. It’s not in the living room or the bathrooms or the kitchen or in the back yard. Which leads me to only one conclusion…

The fucking condom is in my dog’s stomach.

It’s probably as long as her entire intestines (intestine? intestines?). All I have to say is that I hope this doesn’t result in a trip to the vet. I can just hear it now, “Uh, yes, Ms. Bizzle? You see this x-ray here? That slightly see through tube looking thing appears to be a condom in your dog’s stomach.” Fucking awesome.


And after all that, when I picked her up to scold her? She licked my face.



Filed under Baya, SC, TMI